I, too, have had my gods demand this of me. It’s a harder practice than one might think- there’s a lot of guilt I feel over not putting my Beloveds as my highest priority, because I adore them, so isn’t that the way to show it?
Apparently not. Loki made sure that before I made vows of marriage to any of my husbands, divine or mortal, I first made similar vows to love and cherish myself. It was only then that I had his blessing to make such life altering vows: to him, to Morpheus and to my mortal husband. I know in the future, when the time comes for me to make my marriage vows to my fiancé and fiancée, I will take some time beforehand to remind myself of the first vows I made.
Almost fifteen years ago I gave oaths of loyalty, service, and affection to My Lord. This undertaking had more steps than I anticipated. When I first decided, “Yes, this is something I’m going to do”, He stopped me. My heart wasn’t in the right place. My motivation wasn’t right.
But isn’t this right? I asked. This is what you wanted from me. I’m just doing what you asked me to.
That was the problem and that was my very first lesson.
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Mud and Lightning 